.

Flirted away in an art Deco ballroom late into the night
Then slept all day today
There’s a languor in my blood, my veins flow with wine
And wine-dark grapes are growing all over
O taste and see
Vines grown with salt brought by the sea air
That from the distant isles, brings a flavor
Of things that yet may be
A sea’s a mug for all that
A mug to be quaffed in a draught
And when I have swallowed it whole in one bitter gulp
What island will you take shelter in? what refuge
Wont the world be too dry?
Too small—far too quenched
For you--distant one--to be left unspoilt?

~~scio amo
copyright 2007...lol

a narcissist's self-indulgence

Hope an old and jaded fool is allowed to take a little perverse pleasure in hearing others discuss about him...

especially as being talked about is the only pastime for a diva way past his past and his prime gathering dust with not a few old skeletons of forgettable lust

for we are a spectacle...and the crowd needs its bread and circus
lol

some comments on me..impoliteful
tsc tsc

Black: he is a damn liar...i tell u.

Black: he is so double standard yaar...he never reveals his secrets...wen he does he never reveals the name of his sex objects, forget abt subjects...and he reveals all our naughty slutty thing on d blog...THIS IS UN PEU TOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!

zaid: yes.... i knw....v v v shrewd n wicked boy

Black: ei dont call me prude...think abt urself...wat u r? born diplomat...choose politics as ur profession....u will shine like a crazy diamond.

Black: true...the men in my life r eminently forgettable,for instance, u.

scio: i know i am forgettablebut then..all dreams are....no wonder everyone leaves me n forgets me...

Black: u commit sin...but u dont reveal them...how dare u reveal our sins candidly????

Black: no...i dont forget all my dreams...not always.....some dreams r always in my monikotha.;)

hmmmm...what is she indicating?
am i an unforgettable dream?hope others think so too
ishhhhhhhrsr

How are you?...you asked me

How are you?...you asked me
I am fine…I said

How much pain does it take to break a hope
How much is the heart of a man worth?

I don’t know..i don’t want to know
Today I just want to be free

Silence all round me… I danced when I found
Your eyes all around me

But now I will be free..free to die
Don’t save me..dont give me a false hope

I will run through the fields today
Fields untouched by axe and plough
But the green rice grows in them, and golden corn,
And no man toils

The boys are running today
Can’t you see the silver festoons… untimely holiday
No one to beat them…
To their home they will go
To the green forests, and the green fields where golden corn grows
Untouched, unripe

I shall be free today… you will not touch me
Don’t tell me what’s sin… your eyes all around me
I will dance with myself tonight
My hand on my heart, I will forget you

Let my soul be blank…heart don’t betray me
Courage don’t leave me… all the pain that I have felt
Dig a grave for me a thousand feet deep
Where I can lie
Side by side with my hope.. a tinsel princess
My bride…

You never loved me… why did you pretend?
Why did you say you will never leave me?...
Beautiful stranger, leave a rose for me
In my grave, my nuptial bed…

Adeus…you said you will never leave me
Yet not one word did you say…not one thing to show
You cared…
I wont complain

Just let me be alone tonight
Just let me be free
Like those boys running home, their ties unloosed
And sweat on their cheeks,,,

~~by scio amo
copyright 2007...lol

Her crooked story!

Her eyes are lachrymose
Or may be she’s just too fatigued
Her smile is too artificial.
Or maybe it’s hiding her abomination
Her clothes are too gaudy
Or maybe she doesn’t much care about fashion trends...
Her skins like a glazed brown rubber
Or maybe she just rubs it furiously to cleanse herself of the dirt within
Her frame looks too emaciated
Or maybe she can’t gulp down food after what is being rammed inside her mouth
Her lips never utter a word
Or maybe she accepted the fact nobody would listen to her pain.
Her gait carries the burden of misfortune
Or maybe she’s just had a long night at work.
Her child’s uncared for
Or maybe it’s just an occupational hazard
Her thoughts are vague
Or maybe she’s learnt not to think about her ordeal
Her emotions are few
Or maybe her heart has more scars than the marks on her body.
Her soul is soiled
Or maybe its just the need to survive
So now
She sits naked on her rickety bed
Breasts firm on droopy thin shoulders
Legs wide apart…
Waiting for money
Waiting for him
Waiting for redemption
Waiting for freedom
Or maybe just the end of this wretched night…..
© 2007 by Zaid

Talk To Her

Silence hangs in the musty room
Through the motley glass panels
Enters the shadow of a sparrow
To talk to her.
Will silence find words?

The white washed walls,
The shadow of the bird
Inebriated by the reverberation of the panels,
The heap of dust lazing
On the faded portrait of the priest,
Dead, a dozen of years back.

Everything, everything is here
To aggravate the profundity of silence,
Her bereavement, her mourning
For losing her tongue-
A penalty for revealing too much of her heart,
A punishment for resurrecting her corpse
Rotten, stinking, which was lying
In some unknown morgue,
Her putrid corpse….half eaten by millions of ants.

-The Shepherdess

A suicide note!

So I thought I’d just let you go..
Let those moments slip away like sands through my empty hands….
I ain’t bad, but I know I ain’t any
good for you…
We didn’t really go wrong, we just didn’t seem that right..
I know you’d be happy when I’m gone
My love couldn’t give you what I thought it should..
Sad though cause I gave my all..
So walk away from my life.oh! love
Please don’t turn to give me one last look
Cause my eyes wont lie
Yet I don’t want to stop you…
I’ll just jump from these lonely cliffs
I’ll free myself from hope!

I know I have been a disappointment
And that’s what I’ll always be to you
I know I couldn’t be what u wanted me to be
Even though I really wanted to.
I wish you’d understand
I am that I am
Not an aberration
Not a mistake
And it’s not my fault..
I know its not yours either…
So I wont blame you
I’m sorry I’m not that perfect son
I’m sorry you couldn’t pat my back and be proud of me…
Though I’m proud of you..
So please don’t expect anything anymore from me
Just let me hide my face and cry
Don’t wipe my tears
Let them run dry
Cause here I stand at the edge of these barren cliffs
I’ll free myself from shame!

Oh please don’t remember me anymore…
Do not cling to my memories
For they’ll make u you bitter and sad
Maybe even a little guilty..
Don’t shed a single tear for me
Try once not to mock this last gesture of mine
I will be indebted to you all
I ain’t a coward
And yet this is my steadfast choice
So let me erase myself from your esteemed story
I know for sure I don’t merit a place.. even a tiny role..
Please don’t try to search for me
Let me be lost to the winds of time
Let me drown into the sea of oblivion
I don’t want a fake cortege
No formal good byes
So I’ll just jump off these eternal cliffs
I’ll free myself from existence.

By
Zaid al baset
.